Estimated Reading Time: 5 Minutes
I remember being overly anxious during my pregnancy.
I read countless books, looked up reviews on every baby item out there, and read forums that made me paranoid beyond belief.
By the time I was about to deliver Izaak, I felt ready. Like I knew everything about being a mother after spending the last nine months researching. Damn was I wrong.
The internet and books didn’t teach me all there was to know about parenting.
There are many things I had to learn as they happened. But, I was never on my own. I had my husband, and most importantly God by my side every challenging step of the way. Sometimes I feel like God was carrying me until I could get back up.
One of the hardest challenges I had to overcome as a mother was learning how understand my high-energy child. I read articles about high-energy children because based on my family history that there was a chance my child would have A LOT OF ENERGY.
However, I wish the books would have warned me that grown ass adults would call my kid naughty, even though he is simply busy. I’ve learned over time that I know my child better than anyone else. He’s one of the sweetest human beings I know, and he’s definitely nice (Santa thinks so too!).
I wish online articles from experts would have warned me that the first day my son would go to daycare would be one of the hardest days of my life, and that it was normal for me to worry.
Parenting books never explained the guilt I would have when making a mistake that would affect my son negatively. I never knew that I would be mad at myself often for the countless mistakes I made and continue to make in front of my child.
The books did tell me that my son would make milestones and at what age, but they never told me how how proud I would be when I heard Izaak say his first word, or count to thirty (Even though he always missed the number sixteen.).
I wish I would have prepared myself for postpartum depression.
I actually never read any books on the subject, because I never thought I would experience it.
I wasn’t expecting postpartum because I had the most amazing child in the world that I love more than anything else, and I knew that even when he was in my belly. But after I birthed Izaak I was depressed and constantly anxious. I It was hard to be happy.
To be honest, at times I missed my self-centered lifestyle. No one told me THAT would happen. They just said “Enjoy time to yourself while you can.”.
I wish I would have taken the time to prepare myself emotionally. It wasn’t just important for me to learn what I could about raising a child, I should have realized that it was also important to make sure I knew how to take care of myself postpartum.
I was told by the books how tired I would be the first few months of my son’s life when he didn’t sleep through the night.
However, I was never warned how lack of sleep would affect my husband’s and I’s relationship. Or how we were drawn closer together as we became more familiar as parents. We got through it just fine, in fact we are now better people and closer to each other.
You see, just as women are tough enough to give birth, they are also strong enough to endure the trials of motherhood. God gives us basic instincts and strong wills to get through trials that words cannot describe. God is with us, and no matter what season it is, we will be OK. Having a family is an amazing blessing. Going through everything together as husband and wife creates a bond that nothing can break.
There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens: – Ecclesiastes 3:1
Motherhood is still a struggle for me but what matters always is knowing that it’s WORTH IT. I love being a Christian, wife and mom. Nothing will ever change that for me. If I’m blessed enough someday I hope I am that mom who always wants to visit her kids and grandkids and bring cookies. For some reason that sounds exciting to me.
“Children’s children are a crown to the aged, and parents are the pride of their children.” – Proverbs 17:6
Holly, the imperfect momma.